Thursday, July 16, 2009

The Epitome of Class (Part 2)

Back whenever I posted the photo of the black lady with her ultrasound on her t-shirt, I figured, hey, pregnancy can't get less classy than that. Well, I have officially decided to retract that statement.

Last weekend, John and I went over the bridge to Bossier (which I recommend NEVER doing unless you have some sort of extremely specific reason to go such as, fish tacos or visiting a friend). So after we ate fish tacos (I'm getting hungry just thinking about them), John decided that he wanted to go to Hat World or Lids or whatever that place is called in Pierre Bossier Mall.

Side Note: I've decided that malls are places where one should never have to go unless it contains at best ALL or at least one of these three stores:

1. Pottery Barn
2. Anthropologie
3. Williams Sonoma
Honorable Mention: Auntie Anne's Pretzels

Malls have become a collection of what I like to call 'undesirable' stores. They are full of places like Champs, Pacific Sunwear, Gadzooks or The Arabian Gold Herringbone Factory. I can't deal with all of that. I don't want to be bombarded by the guy with the Dead Sea Minerals when I'm trying to get some new underwear from Victoria's Secret, ok?!?

So anyway, off we went to Lids and then John decides that he wants to walk around. Bad decision. There was absolutely NO store in this mall that was even semi-appealing. I take that back. I do like Borders. They have books, which are safe and not trashy. As we were walking past and 'fake-phone calling' to avoid the Proactiv salesman, I spot something out of the corner of my eye: Spencer's.

Okay, I admit. This was secretly one of my favorite places to look during the South Park Mall phase in high school. I always felt guilty going in Spencer's because of all of the trashy stuff they have that I shouldn't be seeing as an upstanding citizen. Like really TRASHY. I'm pretty sure that I learned about sex at Spencer's and hadn't been back since. So, I said, 'Why Not?' I'm here, so I might as well go in. I spotted this immediately after I perused the Sarah Palin: VPILF magnets:

I thought: "Oh, cool! T-shirts." Then I inch slightly closer to reveal Spencer's own line of Maternity T-shirts. Yes, that's right. MATERNITY T-shirts:

Yes, honey. Maybe now he WILL marry you. I immediately did an about face and walked out. This is why I don't go to malls.


Jennye said...

Holy. Crap.
What the heck does VPILF mean? I've got the ILF and I'm assuming P means preggo or something... I'm stuck on the rest.

But that shirt. That's awful!

(PS- you left out the Buckle! in list of acceptable reasons to enter a mall)

Kate said...

VP stands for Vice President.

I gave up the Buckle in high school. Too pricey and too teenager for me.

melissa said...

haha! "maybe he will marry me now". haha

Patrick said...

But wait, did he end up marrying her??