Is This A Southern Baptist Thing?

As I was on my way to the office on Friday, I had to bust out a U-Turn in order to capture this on film:

This is a little hard to read due to the weird sunlight angle. It says "Pastor and Wife Love Day - Aug 23, 2009". What does this mean? Do Missionary Baptist's not celebrate Valentine's Day? Why does the entire church celebrate the Pastor and Wife's love? Is it for their anniversary, perhaps? Is this a ploy to get a free lunch after church? This confuses me. Could someone please clear this up for me.

View From My Desk

At my wonderful new job, we have what I like to call Quirky Policies. This is what I stare at when I'm not turned around chatting with those people who face my back all day or running random errands:

Here's a blind item for the celebrity-obsessed... (I'll even give you multiple choice options, but only because it is raining outside and I feel a little crabbier than normal). Which actor requested that the production office bathrooms be locked because he didn't like that people kept #2ing in them? (Like the production staff doesn't go #2!!!! And like random strangers say to themselves "Oh, I think that I'll go over to Knight Street on the 3rd floor and poo in the men's bathroom?")

Here are the choices (Go ahead and leave a comment with your guess):

A. Val Kilmer

B. Edward Norton

C. Michael Douglas

D. Jesse Metcalfe

E. Luke Wilson

F. Tim Blake Nelson

So, since the aforementioned actor demanded that the bathrooms be locked, we have those signs. Anytime, anyone comes to our office, I have to show them where the key is and direct them to the bathroom, because this policy is ridiculous. BUT, there is an upside. I always know who is in the bathroom and for how long they were in there. So, really I am now the poo monitor. I wonder how that looks on a resume?

Frozen Drink Friday

I just picked these little babies up for the office's Frozen Drink Friday policy. I was given the privilege of choosing the flavors. Instead of going with the Monkey Shine and Liquid Cocaine, I decided to play it conservatively with Margarita and Hurricane:

Also there was a line out the door. At 5:30. I mean, why wouldn't there be? It's buy one get one free from 4-7 at Daiquiri Express. Happy Weekend!

New Poll of The Week!

Last week's poll of the week closed with a whopping six of you saying that you never read the Babysitter's Club series because you were outside playing with your friends. Sad Kate. Oh well, at least some of you voted otherwise. So Dawn Schafer (as predicted) came in 2nd place with 4 votes. Since six of you never read the series and the remaining 11 of you voted for Dawn, Claudia, Mary Anne and Stacey, surely the ones who voted remember the Babysitter's Club Movie, right? Well, this little lady played Dawn Schafer:

Who could forget Larissa Oleynik from 10 Things I Hate About You and Alex Mack? Whatever happened to that girl? I've heard many interesting stories lately from a current co-worker of mine and a former co-worker of hers from when they worked together on TTIHAY. She seems like she would be a really cool girl. I.E. Someone that I would hang with. Speaking of TTIHAY, when Googling an image of Larissa as Dawn, this image came up which is strange since I'm not sure that Julia Stiles would have ever had any connection with Dawn Schafer, unless she is one of the 4 that voted for her in my poll:

Small world, huh? Well since we were talking about TTIHAY (and not talking about how it was one of the first films to feature Heath Ledger in all of his hotness), let's have this week's poll discuss great movies of the 90's and which ones were our favorites! So, go vote and have a wonderful Thursday, friends!

Things That I'm Uncertain About (Part 2)

At some point during the beginning of this month, Fox debuted a new show called "More to Love". The show is basically a fat people (or heavy-set if the word fat is offensive to you) version of 'The Bachelor'. If you would prefer a visual aid, here is the promo poster:

Also, consider this:

I am not sure if this show can get any more ridiculous. First of all, EVERY SINGLE ONE of the ladies complains about how they never got asked out, went to Prom, had a boyfriend, etc. etc. because of their weight. During these diary interviews, it never fails that someone starts crying. I guess they never thought that the reason that they've never been on a date is because they are so neurotic and annoying, instead of being big. But literally for everything, they use their size as an excuse on why they missed out in life. Sounds like they are using this excuse as a 'crutch', (to put it in a metaphor for you) to not partake in things that they didn't want to do. Now don't get me wrong, there are actually a few of them who are cool (like Lauren from Georgia who makes fun of how lame all the girls are), but generally for the most part, Good Lord!

The bachelor guy, Luke, gives me a strange vibe. Like a creepy youth pastor vibe (no offense Jeff), but seriously, he speaks as though he has been thoroughly trained in public speaking, which is a good thing to be trained in, but it comes off to me as just skeevy. He claims to like 'voluptuous' women, but just the way he looks them over (as if he is undressing them with his eyes only to douse them in A1 and eat them like a porterhouse) makes me super queasy.

The women, however, seem to eat it up! One has even gone so far as to tell him that she is in love with him. AND she told him so after being on the show for THREE episodes. So, after the THIRD DATE, she professed her love for him, TO HIS FACE. Why did they not give these women dating manuals?

Also get this, instead of giving out roses, they give out 'promise' rings. How high school is that? Seriously, so cheese ball. Each girl who makes it to the next round, Luke presents with a diamond ring and asks 'Will you wear this ring?' TACKY! THEN, before the next elimination, they all have to return the rings to Luke while he deliberates. Then they all whine about how naked their fingers feel without the rings and how they really really want to get it back because they are so in love with him because he is the first and/or only guy who has ever made them feel special and loved, blah blah.

I'm not trying to overwhelmingly hate on the show, but seriously, did they have to make it so cheesy? I think it's great to showcase women who aren't Size 2, but if these are the only ones that they can find, thanks, but no thanks. I know so many Size 10+ women (including myself) who have dated before, gone to prom, had boyfriends, etc. So why is it that Fox only chose these emotionally unstable sob stories for their show?

Flashback Tuesday

For today's Flashback Tuesday, I thought I would share the story of when I met the black man in my life. Approximately two years ago, I thoroughly perused the Internet/newspaper/Thrifty Nickel in hopes to find the perfect companion for my life. I was sure that having this black man would change my life for the better, so that instead of never being at home, eating out, staying out til the wee hours of the evening, etc. I would stay home and nurture my newest love who depended on me for everything in his life.

So, one day, after much scouring, Sue found him from a breeder/show dog compound in Baton Rouge. The next day, we went and picked him up at a gas station parking lot off I-49 (shady) and then he was mine!!!! Everyone, meet Mr. Pruitt:

This photo was from the very first time that I ever got to meet him. After we picked him up from Shady Gas Station, we took him to Keithy's office for him to get checked out (Keithy is a veterinarian, you know). He checked out perfectly and I took him home and have loved him ever since.

Sad point of the story... Once I finally got him home and living with me and all, my job status changed from regular to movie, which means, that I went from working 8.5 hours in a day to 12+ and I didn't think it was fair to leave Pru Pru at home alone by his lonesome, locked away in a pet carrier for more than half of the day while I was at work. I tried taking him to my parents' house before work every day and then picking him up at night, but this got very tiresome (also, at this point, my parents decided to move from centrally located Line Avenue to basically another country known as Gloster which is even further away than Keithville).

Once they moved, I was out of options. A daily pet sitter was way too expensive so he went to live with my parents. So much for responsibility I suppose. I visit him often and am always so happy to see him, but I miss him so much. One day, when I get a house with a yard (and hopefully a doggie door that Pru will use), I am determined to get him back. In the mean time, he will live in harmony with Sue and Keithy's 4 other little dogs (i.e. Pru's aunts and uncles): Mia, Cookie, Jack and Millie. He gets to play outside in a big yard all day, roll around in dirt, and visit with the aunts and uncles. I think he likes that a lot more than the pet carrier so the end of that story is a happy one. Happy Flashback Tuesday, everyone!

Journey... and More

Last night, against my proper judgement (regarding my summer cold), I went with Mark and Meredith to Tacomania followed by the Journey/Night Ranger concert. I'm pretty sure that I saw the entire city of Shreveport either at Tacomania or at the concert and of course, I was sick and talking with a snot filled nose and trying not to breathe too heavily on anyone.

We got to the concert a little late and jumped in the middle of Night Ranger, who, seriously, were awful, with the one exception of, of course, 'Sister Christian':

Going to the CenturyTel Center for a concert is pretty much asking the City of Bossier to put on their trashiest outfit and come out to play. I have seen a lot over the years of concerts at the CTC, but this one is a definite flashback to a slutty girl that I went to high school, with who spent a lot of her time at Interport (if you grew up in the 71118, you know about Interport) AND youth group:

So, after the intermission and Journey came out, I was pretty sure that I would know all the songs.

Wrong. I seemed to know only about 5-6 of them... which was okay, but when you are praying for the set to be over so you can go home and Neti -Pot, it just seemed to go on and on and on...until they got to 'Open Arms' and everyone got out their lighters/cell phones. Meredith cleverly, managed to combine the two:

By the way. Meredith is my new friend. She is fabulous and I absolutely love her because I feel as though we are on the same page in our opinions as far as trashiness, tackiness, and Bossier. Mark, don't be jealous. So, here is our group pic from the concert:

The guy on the end is Jim. He is one of Meredith's friends who curiously purchased concert merchandise for a female who is NOT his girlfriend. I intend for you to get to the bottom of this, Meredith.

So, on the way back to Mark's to watch Big Brother, we passed by this little sight on Kings Highway:

(If you can't tell, it is a large truck transporting a couch with two humans enjoying the ride.) At least the couch was strapped in, I guess. Stay classy Shreveport... we don't want you to stoop to the lows of Bossier, or God forbid, Keithville.

Flashback Tuesday

Back in high school when I was young and innocent, I had questionable taste as far as dating went. I say this because, two of my three high school boyfriends are now gay. Apparently my requirements back then were:

1. Goes to church (didn't matter what church).

2. Taller than me.

So, you can IMAGINE the types that I brought home. My parents must have had nightmares. So, a friend of mine recently decided to purchase a scanner and upload all of her high school photos. This would be one that I thought that had disappeared into oblivion to never be seen from again:

That would be my first real boyfriend, with whom I shared my first real kiss. There was my Pooh that Sue got me from Disney World. Now, I'm not trying to out anyone on my blog, but you can make the decision for yourself if this one stole my makeup... and my next boyfriend for that matter. Wish me luck on the interview!!!!

New Poll of the Week!

Last week's poll closed with 9 of you saying that you keep cool in the summer by Never Leaving Pool.

Good choice, although I was disappointed to hear how few of you don't wear clothes. Next time, I suppose.

Well this week, the poll is going to discuss the current trends that are taking over our nation. Which one of these is the most annoying trend that you absolutely cannot stand?

A. The success of artists like Taylor Swift and the Jonas Brothers (who, Thank the Lord are finally starting to dwindle with their fame):

B. Fashion trends such as Ed Hardy and Affliction:

C. Mommy Blogs (self explanatory. No one cares about your child's first poo):

D. Stick Portrait Window Clings (I feel as though I've already been over this one):

E. Mounting your television over your mantle (TACKY. Your living room says a lot about you and I feel that your focal point should never be a 52 inch flatscreen. Save it for your man room.):

F. Twitter (although I have one and was recently attacked for saying that I don't think breastfeeding in public is appropriate. That is why they make breast pumps and bottles. No one wants to see your areolas while they are eating a pepperoni pizza.):

Vote, will you, and have a wonderful Thursday!!!

Trends That Are Ridiculous

Along with things such as Affliction T's, Ed Hardy, Taylor Swift, and Twitter (although I do have one), I thought that I would add another trend to the list of things that have gotten EXTREMELY out of hand:

I mean honestly, people. I understand having things like 'family pride' or whatever, but good Lord... STOP ALREADY with your personalized window clings! Trust me, no one cares about your stick family portrait. Leave it for your scrapbook, not for your bumper. You look like an ass.

New Poll of the Week!

Well, well, well. I am apparently a blogging fool today. On a roll with three blog entries posted before noon. I guess that's just how this day is going. So, the Poll of the Week closed with 6 of 13 votes saying that they are going to the beach for their summer vacas! That should be fun. And hot. More than likely, ALL of these beach visits are going to the locale below:

This photo was taken of me and my friends in Destin, Florida at a bachelorette party (Top 3 Bachelorette Parties Ever!) for my dear friend Carie Hart back in 2007. There we are, all lined up (minus the two who didn't make it into the photo, sorry Casey and Melissa, I think) on the beach with our matching airbrushed beach chairs. Good times.

Anyway, anyone from Louisiana only goes to one of two locations to the beach. 1. Destin. 2. Gulf Shores. It is a very rare exception to find a Louisianian who goes anywhere other than these two places or anywhere near the 'Flora-bama'. There are other beaches in the world, people! To each his own, I suppose.

So, yesterday, I did something really weird. I woke up by the alarm on my cell phone. Sent and received two texts. I took a shower and got ready. I went downstairs and made my coffee. Then I left the house. I got in the car and realized that I didn't have my cell phone. I went back inside and overturned the entire house for 5 minutes looking for the phone. It wasn't to be found anywhere, so I had to go to work phone-less. I got home from work at 4 and after MUCH intense searching, I found it. The new Poll of the Week is a quiz. So, where did I find my phone? Good luck!

Mistakes (Part 2)

I warn you, readers, that never, under any circumstances, never, should you watch this show on Discovery Health:

I don't know why, but at some point last night between watching a Chelsea re-run (I guess she doesn't have new shows on Wednesdays) and the local news featuring Jim Belushi, I somehow and for whatever God-forsaken reason, turned the channel to Discovery Health. "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant" was on and I figured, how could these IDIOTS not know that they were pregnant, I mean really.

Well, apparently, you can go full term and right on into labor without missing your 'Devil's Way Of Saying Hello', have no cravings, develop no bump, etc. etc. All of these women's only sign was fatigue. One had lower back pain. One thought she had OVARIAN CANCER (she was 57 and was tampering with in vitro, so she should have known she'd get pregnant, the idiot)!

Nothing sounds scarier to me than going along with your day and your water breaking, followed by crouching on your bedroom floor while your 9 year old cuts the umbilical cord. Seriously, people, do yourself a favor and DON'T WATCH! Unless, you really want a baby of your own and these would be success stories in your eyes.

I guess if you MUST watch, don't watch the show that immediately follows "Obese and Pregnant" (what is it? Baby week or something?), unless you want a really nice self esteem boost... then by all means, go ahead.

Things That Happen When Kate-Naps Are Interrupted

Lately I have had NO energy. Seriously, none. This may stem back to Friday (unexpected day off when Nancy and I went to meet a friend for a margarita at 430PM at the Oyster Bar and didn't return home until 3AM.

All in one night I managed to run into a girl I taught at Disciple Now 3 years ago, a guy that I had a cyber screaming match with 4 years ago, and a girl that I roomed with in France 5 years ago. Not to mention, I had greasy hair, was wearing a tshirt and had no makeup on. AND it was 102 degrees outside so I was all sweaty and shiny. Ugh. Somehow we managed to go from Oyster Bar to Fat Boys to Fat Cats to El Dorado (where I ran into Losing Anna and the entire city of Shreveport) to Fatty Arbuckles to Stray Cat to home. By the way, there are way too many Cats and Fats in this town. Yeah, so it was an intense pub crawl.)

Anyway, I've been sleeping a lot lately. Like I was saying, it may stem back to bad decisions, or possibly a thyroid issue. I'm still paying off a dermatology visit so I have to pay that off before I have other things checked out (paying for my own insurance is costly). So, Sunday night I went to bed at 7 and last night I decided upon a Kate-Nap around 6. People kept texting me, so I ended up having a break from sleeping at 930ish where I got up and went downstairs to watch The Bachelorette (Jillian is a moron) and Chelsea.

I was all nestled on the couch when around midnight my doorbell rang. I froze and my heart started pounding very intensely. Seriously, there was no way in hell that I was going to answer that doorbell. I thought, if this was someone that I know, they would have sent me a text or called to tell me they are coming over. So it was most likely a child pranking me, or a rapist/murderer. (John warns me to never answer the door, even during the daytime. Goes along with the whole don't talk to strangers deal.)

So what do I do? I mute the TV, slide off the couch and army crawl to the bathroom where I hoped to go unnoticed. I stayed there until I decided that it was safe to come out, turn off the TV and lamp (very slowly and quietly) and tip-toe upstairs back to bed under the covers. I texted John and he was all like "Don't answer the door. If it happens again, I'll send a car out (which really made me giggle on the inside. FYI his father is retired Shreveport Police.)" So, I laid there until I fell asleep again.

Well, this morning, I woke up and tip-toed downstairs (I guess in case the doorbell-ringer was still there waiting on me) and made my coffee and got ready to go to work. I opened the front door slowly and peek outside. Nothing on stoop. No extinguished flaming bag of crap, no DVD (someone left one once), and no dead people or blood. So I glance over at my car and there is this on my windshield:

I was thinking "What the crap?!? I never get this stuff. Someone scared the hell out of me last night to leave a rose on my windshield? Was it John? A secret admirer (I have many)?" So I texted John and asked him if he happened to leave anything on my car and he said 'Maybe'.

OK. Mystery solved. Whew! Moral of the story is that I decided that I should toughen up slightly and that John is a sneaky (and sweet) guy.

She's Baaaaack!

Well, it seems like I have been gone for a month, but alas, readers, I have returned from the best vacation ever. John and I had a wonderful time in Seattle. Everything went as well as it could have gone and we both proclaimed to each other that we were experiencing 'Not Wanting To Go Home Syndrome.' Usually we would both be itching to get back but this time we weren't. We've decided to 'summer' in Seattle. So that is that.

All in all, I probably took around 700 photos whilst there, but they are all on my computer at home so I can't share any of them at this time. However, today is your lucky day. While we were there, the one evening that I forgot my camera, John and I ended up having the most entertaining two hours of our lives. We went to a place called The Can Can. You can assume that it is exactly what you think it may be. A burlesque underground club/restaurant. John was thrilled, not only to be at a burlesque show, but to also be responsible for taking all of the photos via Roxanne and then emailing them to me. These are the few images that he captured:

This is me having a Manny's Pale Ale. I'm pretty sure it was a local brew. It was delicious. Also, it was extremely dark in The Can Can and that is why I am so illuminated by the flash (not because I'm pale or anything). We were lucky enough to not be right upon the stage, because we got this nifty overhead lighting:

Since we were underground, this was above us. We could see the shadows of feet walking above us, which was really cool. So after we ate, the show began. It was basically a 4-Man show of the 'Can Can Castaways' and they did a bunch of different dance routines. Sometimes they were all together, sometimes it was a solo or sometimes it was two of them. Once I saw some boobs with star sequined pasties. This is a photo that John took of the four of them. One is dressed as a squirrel, one as a raccoon, one as an owl, and one as a unicorn:

The Unicorn was my very favorite. His name was Faggedy Randy. The other guy calls himself Jonny Boy. Then there were two girls. One's name is Rainbow and the other is Fiona Minx. I called them Trena and Hillary because they resembled two girls I know. Trena claimed to be the choreographer but was always behind a little bit. I decided that I want Hillary's body. Here is a mural that adorns the walls walking into the Can Can:

From right to left: Jonny Boy, Trena, Faggedy Randy and Hillary. If you're bored you should visit their website: http://www.thecancan.com/ . All in all, the show was awesome and the food was good too. A fun evening was had by both.

My Secret Guilty Pleasure

I fear that this post may be cause for some of my friends to delete me from their lives, and I'm semi-embarrassed to admit this, but I LOVE this show:

Paris Hilton's My New BFF Season 2. This show is so ridiculous and so dumb that for whatever reason, I am mesmerized by it. On last night's episode, Queen Paris (who for whatever reason is constantly wearing a bejewelled headband and thinks it is cute to talk/squeak like a twelve year old) introduced the wannabe BFF's to her friend Mark. Mark is engaged and getting married in three weeks. So basically she had the BFF's take him out for his bachelor party as this week's challenge. They get there and these girls/boy get wasted!! One girl (Monica) gives Mark a lap dance where you could see her vagina as well as her entire breasts (it wasn't a pretty sight, as she is not a Size 2 like Paris is. Not that that would be a pretty sight anyway), and then another girl (Arika) makes out with Mark, all while Paris is watching nearby.

The morning following the party, Paris arrives in her pink Bentley and has all of the girls come outside for a meeting. Except for Arika (Paris had Onch keep her inside and told her that she had a surprise for her. By the way, this is Onch:

Onch is the most ridiculous character I have EVER seen on television. He/She was a former contestant of Paris' first season of the BFF show and ended up losing. However, he is such a character that she brought him with her as her 'Pet' to this season. Onch is a man who thinks he is a woman. He dresses and talks like a 15 year old school girl. So, I guess you could say that he is transgender. One more photo of Onch just for fun: And yes those are Mickey Mouse-Hair ears)

So anyway, Onch finally brought Arika outside to her 'surprise' which included Arika doing the walk of shame and apologizing to Mark for making out with him and behaving like a backstabbing slut. THEN, Paris brought out Mark's fiance and had Arika apologize to her, just before dismissing her from the show.

I was so embarrassed for her!!!!!!!!!!! I mean, that has to be the worst, right? Then Paris kicked Monica (Vagina-Flasher) off the show for being so slutty in public saying that Paris had a mental image of her vagina etched into her brain. I was sort of proud of Paris for doing that. Maybe she does have some values? Eh, probably not.

When Paris dismisses a contestant from her show, she even manages to add insult to injury by telling them: T.T.Y.N. (Talk To You Never.) I believe I have a new slogan to add to my abbreviated speak. I can't get enough!

Flashback Tuesday

I found this photo whilst rummaging among my secret belongings that I keep hidden:

This is Libby Gifford and I at the BCM 80's prom during TWIRP week circa the year 2001. Sorry Libby.

Things That May or May Not Be Held Over My Head For the Rest of My Life

Over ten years ago, John picked me up for our first date (we were going to church) and he pulled up in the driveway and honked. In the pouring rain. Wasn't planning on coming to the door at all. My mother, myself and my friend Paige looked at each other in disbelief. He honked again. We continued to sit there and wait. Finally he came to the door. I haven't let him live it down since. I fear that my honk moment is on the horizon.

So, John and I are getting super excited about our trip to Seattle at the end of this month. I have booked the flights, and just a few days ago, I booked a hotel. We originally had a hotel that was going to cost us in the range of $1400 (is that too personal? Nah.) I thought that this was ASTRONOMICAL, but it was the hotel that John HAD to stay in because it was close to the part of town that he wanted to be. Well $1400 is nearly two mortgage payments for me and I am not going to pay that for a six day jaunt. So I started looking around for something that would end up costing us less. (We are cheap.)

I don't even remember how exactly I ran across this hotel, but I thought... for a total of $600 for six nights, and a block from PIKE PLACE MARKET (!!!!!!!), I do not need a hair dryer and flat screen with my room. So, I sent John a text saying, I found a hotel for $800 less than other room and he said get it. So I got it. I present to you The Moore Hotel:

The Moore was built in 1907 and has a lot of history behind those walls. There is also a theatre attached to it (the oldest theatre in Seattle) which was apparently the place to be when it was built. Acts still perform there today. I thought all of this was pretty cool when I went and looked around their website after I booked the trip. There weren't many photos on the website, but I looked on Trip Advisor and there was a 4 out of 5 star average. I kept investigating and found three interesting, yet hilarious reviews:

Review 1: "The greatest thing about the Moore is that it has the Nite Lite downstairs so you can get completely shitfaced drunk and stumble backup to your room with a stolen plant from the bar and since you are still in the same building not feel remorse for stealing it. If you get the suite there is a lovely table on which you can place the stolen, yet not stolen, plant and admire it." - Drue from San Francisco A photo of said Nite Lite (which upon further investigating, seems like a West Coast version of the Tiki Tavern minus the karaoke!):

Review 2: "There are a lot of sites to see around the hotel, including the adjoining Moore Theater. I am going off on a tangent from the hotel a moment, but the theater is reputed to be haunted. During our stay, the TAPS team was at the theater investigating paranormal acitivity throughout the night. If you are unaware, TAPS investigations are aired on the Sci-Fi channel and can be pretty entertaining. Back to the hotel. The lobby and the rooms are very spartan, but we are not here to stay at the hotel all day. The rooms lack air conditioning, but the windows open! We also got to spy on the camera crew below, after our night on the town. Three stars for the hotel, one more added for the "celebrity sighting" of TAPS. And yes, we would stay there again." - April from Portland (Steph- I need to borrow your tape recorder.)

Review 3: "Once you're checked in, you might notice all the marble lobby with the art decoish furniture, the creepy hallways (different floors are painted different colors, but it all looks like something out of a twilight zone episode) and the view from the upper floors. The Moore is a 'historic' hotel, meaning that sometimes the tile in the bathroom is cracked and the floors creak and there aren't many modern conveniences, but none of that matters because it's got crown moldings and shit. The Moore Hotel is also cheap, and right downtown. Visitors with drinking problems will appreciate all the bars nearby; The Nite Lite is in the building, The Whisky Bar is across the street, and Shortys, The Virginia Inn, and The Blarney Stone are just a couple blocks away. I'd stay here again next time I'm in Seattle (which should be soon.) P.S. Room 618 has a really cool iron clawfoot tub, in which at least one Yelper has passed out in a bridesmaid's dress." - Matthew from Boston

A photo of said creepy hallway:

Two more photos... Photo #1 of a few amenities. Photo #2 of a nice little view:

After further investigation and a few prayers, I decided that I am not worried. This looks like an upstanding, economical, historic, efficient (in terms of walking) and quaint decision that I have made. John may be slightly worried, but I am not. I am confident that this place will be fine and that we won't be attacked by zombies, or drunks and their plants.

However, if this is not the case, I am confident that this will be grounds for persecution for years to come.

Russian Roulette = Crack

Now, I know in this day and age no one watches the Game Show Network. (Except me!) I love old reruns of Let's Make A Deal, Family Feud, Pyramid, The Newlywed Game, etc. John constantly nags me about changing the channel when I decide that I want to watch an episode of Lingo, which is one of their newer shows (hosted by Chuck Woolery, formerly of Scrabble. God, I loved that man growing up).

One day whilst perusing the Guide option on the Direct TV remote, I saw that a show called Russian Roulette was on GSN. I thought, "Wow, this HAS to be good." Let me just say that I was not disappointed. First of all, it's hosted by Mark Wahlberg:

I knew that's the Mark Wahlberg that you were thinking of. But no, it's actually THIS Mark Wahlberg:

(If he looks familiar, but unplaceable, please refer back to the 90's when he was the host of Shop Til You Drop. It came on after Supermarket Sweep on Lifetime.) Apparently, Mark here has taken a career nosedive after that. Since STYD he has partaken in Temptation Island and Antiques Roadshow. I guess life threw him a bone, because now, like I said previously, he is the host of Russian Roulette.

I know what you're thinking. This show is probably about some sort of revolver with bullets and people die. Nah, too gruesome for GSN. It's actually a game where there are 4 contestants set above six trapdoors. They go around and challenge each other to answer questions (while completely trashtalking. Bonus!) If a question is answered correctly, a trapdoor is opened beneath them. The most trapdoors that can be opened are 5 (remember there are six total). So when a contestant gets a question wrong they have to pull a lever and thus the Russian Roulette starts. Sometimes they are safe and their trapdoor is spared, but other times you get this:

I apologize for the small photo. But please note that THE CONTESTANT DROPS THROUGH THE STAGE UNEXPECTEDLY AND IS NEVER SEEN FROM AGAIN!!!!

Seriously, THANK YOU Game Show Network. This is the most entertaining game show I have ever watched. Please, if you have a DVR, I beg of you... for guaranteed laughs, record this show and think to yourself "Wow, television can't get any better than this."

Scott Baio Sighting (53 and Still Single)

One of my favorite hangouts in the world is known as the ever classy Tiki Tavern (not to be confused with the Tiki Bar). When a person steps through those doors on a Friday evening, they should have already prepared themselves for some sort of show. If not a drag queen who calls herself 'LaTina Turner', then the antics of Jim Pittman (the karaoke ringleader) are enough entertainment for the weekend.

This Friday I met these friends there:



(I hung out with the two humans, not the dog). So as we are sitting there amongst the regulars, John and Rex Rupert, in walks the spitting image of Scott Baio:


(I apologize for the blurriness and the bright light... I wasn't using a flash for nonchalant purposes, folks). For most of the evening, I only had the back view. It wasn't until he had a few drinks that I got this:


He was getting very handsy/feelsy with this lady in the pink. At this point, he had a Javier Bardem thing going on. For the rest of the evening, Claire, Eric and myself watched the show. There was butt grabbing, making out and I'm pretty sure there was a lesbian who was waiting in the wings getting very, very jealous. At one point, Scott Baio was petting the hair of said lesbian and Claire and I were caught laughing. So, lady in the pink comes over to me and says and I quote:

"Never in your life have you had a man touch you as gentle as he does." Wow. Necessary? So, she continues unwelcomed and tells me a story of how last weekend some girls came up to herself and Scott and asked if he was the guy on Myspace who is all in spandex. (I'm thinking WHAT?!?!?!?!? the whole time.) So, over the course of this 'pow-wow' with "Lady In Pink" I learned that Scott was 53 and according to her, had 'Abs of Steel' and his real name was Philip. Too much information.

Well after I had my fill of people watching, John and Rex took me home. As soon as I stepped through the threshold, I got on Myspace of course. Behold:

http://www.myspace.com/365363201

Just a little teaser:




You are welcome, Shreveport. You are welcome.

I Dream of Blue?

Growing up, we had a cat. Don't ask why. We all hated cats for different reasons. My brother was allergic, Mom hated all the hair everywhere, and I thought they were shady. Nonetheless, one day Keithy brought a cat to the house and it ended up becoming a permanent resident. She looked a lot like this:

We didn't know what to name her because none of us really liked her. We decided that in certain lights she had a blueish tint to her coat, so therefore we named her Blue. Original, I know. (Turns out she came with a different name, but we all thought that Sir Nelson was a little formal and weird, AND Sir Nelson turned out to be a Miss Nelson, thus the name change).

Blue lived with us for about 5 years when Mom came up with the idea that she wanted to build a new house. So Blue and the 4 dogs that we had at the time (My stepdad is a vet, don't judge) moved. Sue decided that Blue shed WAY too much to have her live in the house, so she was banished to the garage. She acted like she always wanted to come inside, but secretly I think she loved it out there. She got to hunt bugs, mice and had numerous adventures to where she would go missing for a few days here and there.

Over the course of her garage life, she lost an eye. So then her name changed from Blue to Blue the One Eyed Cat. At some point I accidentally ran over her with the car when backing out of the garage. I never told my parents that for obvious reasons... then eventually she passed away a few years later. I eventually told Mom, but not Keithy.

So last night, under the influence of a Tylenol PM, Blue came to me in a dream. It was very surreal because in the dream, I lived at the house in Ruston that I lived for 2 years. There were all of these cats wanting to come inside the house, and Blue was one of them. (I called her simply Blue because in this dream, she had both eyes). She seemed to be trying to tell me something.... then my phone rang in real life and woke me up. I wish I could have been asleep just a little bit longer in case she had something important to tell me.

Oh well. I'm just glad to know that when she went to heaven, she got her other eye back.